I feel a bit stupid.
I feel like I've only just really woken up to what I've been doing and want to seriously change it.
For ten years I've been (desperately) trying to teach Axel, change Axel, corral Axel to be more like me, us etc etc to be happy, to be safe etc etc and in doing so have not really stopped to know him. Really stopped to know him.
I get that Axel is super different and I've spent so much of my time trying to shoe horn him into a more me type of thing and I feel a bit of a klutz for not accepting him more and getting to know him. Appreciating him. Enabling him to be a him.
There. Dick. I've done it a lot but not nearly enough.
Perhaps this applies to all people for me. I'm so consumed with my meness I'm not really listening to their themness.
Damn.
Please say, you too.
Eugh.
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